Shadow work requires you to be honest with yourself…
Are you able to tell yourself the truth without reservations?
Outside accountability prompts some of us to do better when we are accountable to someone or something outside of ourselves. Self-accountability can offer too much leniency and the tighter parameters of being accountable to someone else can corral our efforts and focus. However, this doesn’t remove the necessity to be truthful with ourselves. Honesty to yourself is always a necessary part of how we navigate life and it can impact the ways in which you process. Let’s talk about this for a minute…
There is the impact of the lie you tell yourself that is about a personal situation. And then, there is the impact of the lie that you tell yourself about the world around you and how it impacts others. Some truths are hard to admit and so pushing them aside or not discussing them can seem to temporarily assuage the sting it causes. But a pause on the sting doesn’t negate the bite. If shit is hard, it is either hard now or hard later. And sometimes later it is harder because time made the situation worse than if you had just been upfront and proactive. A recipe to create shadows to process later…
I’ve witnessed too many people over the years believe that they can ignore reality if they tell the lie with their whole chest. To the point that they no longer remember the truth and seem offended that you would even consider that what they are sharing isn’t accurate. They have convinced themselves and they want to convince you too. This is a gateway into creating an alternate reality that they live in and want you to live in too. They truly believe that it is real but it’s fake…just like their own personal Matrix. Not being honest with yourself and allowing it to mingle with the lies of others is a prime way that shadows are created.
Again, a self-created room full of shadowed elements left to spread like weeds in a garden.
I know damn well you don’t want to live in a poisoned garden that seeks to seep in and overrun your existence. You want better for yourself. I know firsthand how hard it is to process shadows created by my interactions with others, so I have zero desire whatsoever to create more shadows of my own design to wait for me. Because that is what happens, I want you to be aware because I know you can ward off the future turmoil that is created by neglecting the truth.
The shadows will wait and stay unhealed and create chaos until you get your house in order.
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Shadow work is necessary because of what is created by misdeeds, traumas, lies, and half-truths. Not attending to the shadows created and letting them fester only makes the job bigger. Being untruthful with yourself about the reality of what is going on inside of you only compounds the emotional and spiritual interest you will pay later. This isn’t about what you don’t know… this is about what you deny.
We need one another and to truly be within the existence of interdependent community we have to do the work. We have to work to heal our wounds and to release what continues to fester and create harm. Can you seek to find where your darkest parts are and what caused them to be shrouded and hidden? And to be clear, darkness does not mean negative. It could be a glorious part of yourself that you were conditioned to believe should never see the light of day.
What shines within you that others have convinced you is bad and should be hidden?
What strength within you have you been led to believe is a weakness?
How has your light been dimmed by those afraid of it?
In the True Heart Intuitive Tarot Deck by Rachel True, the Death card (XIII) shows a person bearing their inside which sparks the truth of what needs to die as you continue on the journey. Death is not about finality, it is about transformation and a fertilization of what is next to come. Holding on to what is out of fear of what may be does not stop the future from becoming the present and ultimately the past. The cycle is always in motion and so it is imperative that you allow yourself to release what has been a part of your journey to make space for what is already on the way (or is already here).
If it is helpful for you, think about the seasons and how nature goes dormant in some ways to rest and prepare for what is next to come. Acknowledge when your Winter is coming and how you will prepare for it, and its inevitable move into spring. Shadow work is a tool for fertilization, winterization, air circulation, and admiration. You can’t help but to recognize the beauty of the journey as you learn how to flow with its tides and winds.