You Are Not The Imposter
The truth about what Imposter Syndrome is and isn't.
Today I’m keeping it simple with some words of clarity and encouragement…
Photo by sydney Rae on Unsplash.
Black asphalt with the words “ you got this” written in white chalk.
Imposter syndrome is a term that many of us are way too well acquainted with. But what if it's not what you thought it was?
What if it is the fear of you being so much more than you ever dreamed?
Imposter Syndrome (sometimes called Imposter Phenomenon) was first coined in the late seventies by Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes.
Imposter syndrome was said to describe the feelings of not being good enough and having arrived at success out of chance or simply pure luck. I heard about it years ago and it was essentially this idea of:
What if I can't do this?
I'm not good enough.
I'm not going to do it because I'm not ready.
Yes, I succeeded once and it was a fluke.
Let’s say you are beginning something new, doing something you've always done or trying to foray into a new area. And you get this feeling of, I'm not capable, I'm not qualified, I don't deserve this. All of the things begin to come up that are based on fear to dissuade you or throw you off the path. But the reality is that they're pretty much always false. They're not rooted in actual reality.
And most of the time when fear does show up for us, the fear is based on the fear of
What if this goes well?
What if I succeed?
If you think about it, for someone who grew up with any type of abuse or trauma, you were likely conditioned to shrink yourself. This also comes up for some people who grew up with the notion of children being “seen” and not “heard”.
You were supposed to be smaller. Your feelings, your wants, your needs, and your emotions didn't matter and were invalidated (an example is hugging family members by force). You may have felt as though you were not important. Or being smaller made you less of a target. Maybe you had to remake who you were at your core in order to survive.
But if that is not your reality now, or you are actively working to create a new reality for yourself, then the old concepts just don’t fit the same anymore. And you finally hit this point of…
I don't want to just exist. I am now ready to thrive…
…and you're evolving into this next best version of yourself.
I believe that imposter syndrome is not the fear of not being enough or lacking in some way.
What if the imposter isn’t who you’re becoming and it really is who you are no longer choosing to be?
What if the imposter is the person that you had to be just to get through and now you're having this resistance or strange feeling because this new version does feel more like you? I believe you are unbecoming someone that isn't inherent to you. You were who you had to be to navigate your reality at that point in time. However, it is not the same now and you can choose differently.
Imposter syndrome is the fear of what you will become when you integrate and enact your true abilities.
I'm going to say it again.
Imposter syndrome is not the fear of not being enough or lacking in some way.
It does feel more inherent. It does feel more comfortable. And yet, it's very foreign. It's not what you're used to. It's not what you're accustomed to. So, that feels unsettling to an extent because it is new. But new can be good. Familiar and comfortable can sometimes be the trap. What you did before wasn't necessarily good for you long term. It was what you had to do and now you can make a choice.
So if you’ve been used to being very assured and certain of what you’re doing, and suddenly this feels scary and you feel unqualified…
Well…maybe this is your imposter syndrome. The nervousness of acknowledging that you are assured, certain, and qualified.
Maybe this is you hitting a point where you have to undo everything that you thought you knew about yourself to find your truth.
Here’s a prompt to foster you diving in deeper here for yourself.
Who have you been that you never consented to be?
This comes from my book Who Are You? so grab your copy if you haven’t already so you can continue your shadow work journey!
✨Erica